A Mindful Perspective
Welcome to my podcast! I'm Nick Levesque, and I'm on a mission to help you navigate life's challenges with a mindful perspective. Join me every week as I dive deep into the realms of mindset, spirituality, and personal growth. Drawing from my own experiences, I want to provide you with tools, strategies, insights, and inspiring stories that will help you go from where you are now, to where you want to be.
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A Mindful Perspective
Mastering the Art of Saying No: Setting Boundaries for a Healthier Life
Discover the liberating power of saying no and learn how to reclaim your energy and well-being. Join me, as I unpack the essential skill of saying no in our latest episode of A Mindful Perspective. Drawing from my personal battle with people-pleasing and the workplace anxiety of declining requests, I share transformative insights and practical strategies to help you prioritize your needs and stay true to your values.
Explore the intricate patterns of people-pleasing and the savior complex, where the intense need for approval and the compulsion to save others take center stage. Unravel the roots of these behaviors—often buried in our past experiences—and understand how they contribute to stress and anxiety. By shedding light on these tendencies, we pave the way for healthier boundaries and improved mental health, ensuring you reclaim your time and energy for yourself.
Empower yourself to master the art of saying no with authenticity and respect. From direct yet gentle refusals to the effective "sandwich method," I offer a toolkit to communicate your limits confidently. Reflect on your own boundary-setting practices and embrace the journey towards self-care and balance. This episode is a reminder that saying no is a powerful act of self-love, bringing you closer to a balanced and fulfilling life. Tune in and take the first step towards prioritizing your well-being.
Hello everyone and welcome to A Mindful Perspective. I'm your host, nick Levesque, certified Spiritual Life Coach, and I'm here to share insights into my journey of mindfulness and self-discovery. Each week, we'll explore mindset, spirituality and personal growth to help you navigate life's challenges, with practical strategies and inspiring stories. Let's dive in. Hey everyone, welcome to another episode of A Mindful Perspective. In today's episode, we're going to be talking about the art of saying no and how to say no and learning why saying no is so important, because it's something that I know for a fact that a lot of people struggle with right, myself included for a very long time and still to this day from time to time. Okay, so it's something that I think is a skill that we can get better at, but I know it's something that a lot of people struggle with. So I really wanted to dive into this today and really talk about learning the importance of how to say no. So, first and foremost, I really wanted to start this off by saying that learning how to say no for me personally, I think, is one of the most powerful things that I've ever done for myself, and it took me a long time to really dive into that. It took me therapy, coaching, all these different things right, because, again, I'll dive into this in a bit but I do believe that a lot of the difficulty in trouble with saying no tends to be with people pleasing tendencies. Okay, I know for a fact that that was the case for me, some clients that I've worked with and just people that I've talked to kind of along my path, right. So, and learning how to say no, I think it it's. It's like I mentioned earlier, it's truly one of those arts, it's a skill that we need to learn, especially if we've been saying, or or we've been having trouble saying no for a lot of different things, right, for a lot of different circumstances in our lives.
Speaker 1:But the thing we must understand when it comes to saying no is that saying no is about establishing a boundary. Okay, and I'll do an entirely different episode on boundaries, but boundaries are one of the most crucial aspects that we can implement in our lives. There's so many different types of boundaries, right, we can have boundaries with our digital devices, right. We can have physical boundaries where we let people know that, as an example, maybe we don't like to be touched a certain way. All these different things, right. But I truly believe that learning how to say no is also establishing a boundary okay, and boundaries are a form of self-respect, but they also teach other people how to treat you as well.
Speaker 1:Okay, so this is why I'm saying that learning how to say no is probably one of the most important things that we can do in our lives, because, obviously, when you learn how to say no properly and to the things that don't align with you, you get more of your time, your energy back and also, you're not constantly stressed and overwhelmed. Because if there's anything I've learned in my own journey personally from learning how to say no, is that it was something that was stressing me all the time. Right, it was something that, you know, if someone asked me something and I was, I had trouble saying no. I would get stressed, I would get anxious, right, all these different things. But if there's anything I want you to take away from this episode today, it's this okay, saying no can mean saying yes to yourself, right? So this is something that I read a while back that was back, that really had a profound shift in my understanding and my perspective on how to say no, because sometimes, when we don't say no, right, this can be in the workplace as an example. Okay. So even if you want to pause me for a second, think about maybe a specific time or circumstance in your life where you have trouble saying no.
Speaker 1:Okay, for me personally a few years ago, I know this was in the workplace, where people would ask me to do certain tasks, where my boss would ask me something, and I would say yes to everything because I was afraid to say no. Right, and we'll dive into reasons why that is, but basically I was afraid to say no and what that would do is that would overwhelm me. That would overwhelm me. I would take on way too much tasks that I couldn't handle and all these different things. And then I get stressed, I get, and that actually had an impact on my ability to actually complete those tasks, because now I was so overwhelmed and so stressed that I couldn't even concentrate and get the work done, or I did it in a manner that was so rushed that it didn't really kind of highlight the quality of the work that was supposed to be done.
Speaker 1:Okay, so these are different things that can happen when we don't learn how to say no properly, and for me personally, saying no or learning how to say no again was so important because I remember a few years ago when I was really struggling with this and again this for me personally anyways came from a form of people pleasing, and I remember like if someone would ask me something or ask me to hang out, or specifically, when someone would ask me to hang out or do something and I just didn't want to, I felt like staying home, I felt like relaxing. That for me was a huge trigger and I know that can seem kind of very simple to a lot of people, but for me personally it was such a big issue because again, they were asking me to do something, to hang out, inviting me somewhere, and I didn't want to go, for whatever reason that. Maybe I just wanted to relax, maybe the circumstance or the place that I was invited to, just you know, didn't resonate with me or aligned with my values, but either way, I had so much trouble saying no and that, for me, caused me so much stress and anxiety. Because, first and foremost I think that's the thing about learning how to say no is that oftentimes we don't know how to say it right. We don't know how to say it because we're afraid that the other person might misinterpret that right. A part of it also might be that we feel like we might get rejected if we don't accept that offer, and there's so many different things. Okay, but oftentimes, for me personally, that's what it was right. It was like hmm, if I say no to this right, will they not accept me anymore, will they not like me anymore? Or, again, a big part of it is, will I offend them? Okay, and all these different factors made it extremely difficult for me to actually say something, to actually say no.
Speaker 1:So there's a few things that would happen is one first and foremost, I'd be stressed, I'd be anxious, because I didn't know what or how to reply. And secondly, sometimes because I didn't know what or how to reply, and secondly, sometimes because I didn't know what or how to reply, I wouldn't reply for hours. And for those hours that I wouldn't reply, it would be in the back of my mind playing constantly. I would be trying to figure out a story on how I got out of that right Because, again, I didn't want to upset them, I didn't want to offend them. So I was trying to formulate a story to try to make it seem like, you know, oh, maybe I was just busy or maybe, you know, I just didn't have time at the moment, right, and this is what I mean. And it just caused me so much anxiety.
Speaker 1:And for a lot of people, this is what happens when we are having difficulty saying no, right, and for me, you know, it got to a point where it was a very chronic form of people pleasing and I'm sure some of you listening to this might be like, wow, I didn't know it could get to that point, and it definitely can, I know. For me personally, it did where I literally couldn't reply for hours because I didn't know how to say no to that thing, right? So instead of just saying, hey, thank you for inviting me, I do appreciate the offer, but tonight I just feel like staying in and spending time with myself right there. That's a perfect sentence that you can say, especially if you're someone like me who really enjoys their alone time. Right, and that was the thing for me for a lot of like, a lot of it was that a lot of times I got invited to different places or hanging out with people, and there's nothing wrong with that, like, obviously I love hanging out with people, but also a lot of times is I love that balance of also spending time by myself, but when people would ask me to do something, I felt so, you know, so bad about saying no. I didn't want to offend them, but a big part of it and a big part of people pleasing as well and sometimes why it felt like I was had to say yes. And for a lot of times, by the way, like for many years, I did say yes because, again, the thing about this is I wanted to feel accepted. I wanted to make sure that people liked me and that I wasn't getting rejected. Okay, and a lot of it for a lot of people pleasing, by the way, this is a big part of it. It's, of course. One part is that, you know, sometimes we genuinely do want to help people and be of service Okay, but a lot of times is that we don't want to offend people. A lot of times is that, also, we don't want to offend people because we want them to like us, right. We want them to keep that same image that they currently have of us. We want to make sure that we're still accepted. So a lot of the people pleasing is seeking validation, if I can be completely honest, right, and I mean that very respectfully, but it's something I've learned in therapy and coaching and with myself as well, and when I sat down to reflect about that, it's like, hmm, okay. So obviously there's a feeling of low self-worth here. For me personally, if the only way that I'm feeling accepted or validated is from other people, right, and that was the thing for me personally, and that's why I had so much trouble saying no. It was like, hmm, okay, well, if I do say no to this, maybe they'll stop inviting me, maybe they'll stop being my friend, maybe they won't care about me anymore, maybe all these what if? Scenarios, right? So this is what I'm saying Oftentimes, people pleasing can go much deeper than just wanting to please other people, if that makes sense, right?
Speaker 1:But again, this is also why it's so important to learn how to say no, so we can kind of claim our power back. I think that's a big part of it as well, is, you know, you step into that confidence of being able to say no because, like I said earlier, when you say no, saying no can mean saying yes to yourself. So if someone's inviting you out and you really don't want to go, okay, well, you say no. Right? You say no, thank you or whatever you're saying, you're reclaiming some of that power back. And now you're reclaiming some of that power back. And now you're doing something that you generally want to do. Maybe it was staying in or reading a book, maybe it was staying in and just having time with yourself or with a friend or with your partner, it doesn't matter what. It is Okay. And so this is what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:And obviously, learning how to say no isn't just saying no to everything either. I just want to be very clear about that. Like, as we're kind of practicing this and learning how to say no, it's not about saying no to everything, because again, then we might miss out on cool opportunities and such right, but really it's about learning how to say no to things that don't align with us. Right, we should only accept requests that align with our personal values. Right, that make us feel good and for which we have time and energy for right, and that's what I'm a firm believer in. Okay, and if you don't learn how to say no, not only is it going to cost you, you know, or make you very anxious and stressed and overwhelmed, but in my personal opinion, you are throwing away your most valuable currencies, which are time and energy, right? If you don't say, if you say yes to everything, then obviously you're not helping yourself. You're going to get overwhelmed after a while, you're going to get very stressed and you're not taking time to do things that you want to do. So this is what I'm saying you can learn how to say no respectfully.
Speaker 1:And another very important factor that I want to bring in here as well is that if you say yes to everything, especially in different circumstances, some people will take advantage of that. Right, some people can take advantage of your inability to say no. That's a really big thing as well, because if you keep saying yes, yes, yes, well, someone might see that as, hmm, okay, like he says yes to everything. Maybe you know, and some people are like that. I don't mean to be disrespectful, but some people will take advantage of your inability to say no, so that's very important, okay, so now let's dive in a bit further here and talk a bit more about why it is that we have trouble saying no.
Speaker 1:So, first and foremost, I think that our inability to say no it stems from a lot of different places in different circumstances, but sometimes it's that we don't know when to say no or what to say no to. Okay, depending on the circumstance, it could also be we're unsure how to politely say no. That's a big one, especially for me as well. That one, I think, for me personally was kind of the driving factor, to be quite honest, okay. Also, we're being worried about how the no will be received, okay, so maybe we'll worry that some people will kind of become upset or angry when we say no to something, okay, and again, that for me personally, was a big part of it as well. And I want to talk about two big driving factors of our inability to say no, okay.
Speaker 1:So the first one we touched on a bit earlier, and that's people pleasing Okay. So again, I won't do an entire episode on people pleasing, okay. So again, I won't do an entire episode on people pleasing. But basically, people pleasing, like we talked about, can can stem from a lot of different circumstances, right, but some signs of people pleasing, as an example, could be difficulty saying no, right.
Speaker 1:So that's one. First and foremost, it's the difficulty to say no, right. We're constantly struggling to decline requests or offers or, you know, sometimes we're agreeing and even though it's very inconvenient for us, right? So those are obviously definitely some signs of people losing. It could be overcommitment, right, so we're regularly taking on more than we can handle okay, because we want to make sure that we're not letting other people down. Okay, it could be guilt we feel guilt when we're prioritizing ourself right, so we feel guilty. We're selfish when we're putting our own needs first, and that's another big symptom of it.
Speaker 1:Okay, it could be excessive apologizing. Now, this one, this one is a big one, and this one is something that I struggle with a lot as well. And, to be quite honest, it's when we're apologizing often and unnecessarily, right, so sometimes we haven't even done anything wrong and we're trying to just say sorry, to kind of like, smooth out the situation, make sure there's no conflict, right. So it could be that we're saying no to something and we're like oh sorry, I can't make it in all these different things, right, and there's nothing wrong with that. But, like, for me personally, what I noticed is like I was saying no to like or sorry. I was saying I'm sorry to everything, right, when I couldn't do something or all these different things. I was always saying I'm sorry, and that is a bit of a problem, right, it can become a bit of a problem Because, again, that was a people pleasing tendency.
Speaker 1:I wanted to make sure that they understood that you know it had nothing to do about them and such. But the truth of it, right, and this is what my therapist told me is, you know, I don't have to explain myself, I do not. You never need to explain yourself when you're saying no to something, right? You don't need to explain yourself If someone, as an example, is inviting you out somewhere and you don't want to, okay, you can just say no, I'm not interested, thank you, anyways. Anyways, right, you don't need to say I'm sorry, I don't want you. You don't need to try to validate or justify why it is that you don't want to go out. Okay, if you don't feel like going out, that's completely fine, and that's something that I had to learn personally, right? So these are just a few signs of people pleasing that I kind of wanted to talk about.
Speaker 1:But, again, oftentimes we don't want to offend or hurt anyone, right? We don't want to feel rejected. So we put our health on the line, literally, we put our health on the line, we get anxious, we get stressed, okay, and again, like I said, this can lead to a lot of stress, anxiety over committing and taking on too many tasks that we know that we can't do. Right At work, as an example, and people pleasers. Again, we worry that saying no might lead others to view us negatively, right? So, basically, we don't want people to think less of us or reject us. Okay, our need for approval and acceptance is a powerful motivator. Okay, and because of that because we are looking for that approval, that external validation and that acceptance it can make it very hard for us to set boundaries. So this is what I was talking about earlier. This is why it's so important to learn how to set those boundaries, okay, so this is the first topic that I want to talk on, about people pleasing and a lot of people pleasing. Again, I want to be very clear on something it could be stemming from childhood as well.
Speaker 1:The second factor that I want to bring in is a fascinating one as well, and it's called the savior complex or the white knight syndrome. Okay, and it's actually exactly how it sounds. So the savior complex usually involves this, this need, right? It's almost like this deep seated need to help others, and not only help others, but it's this feeling of wanting to save others or, more specifically, having to save others, okay. So a lot of times these people can almost again take on too much responsibility, right? And typically, individuals with a saver complex, they don't only feel like they need to save others, they feel compelled to because they feel like they were the only ones who can solve the issue or can solve their issue specifically, right. So, again, this is very important to understand it's that these people, okay, feel it's almost like they feel like a hero where they go and they need to save that person. They need to save someone, right. So there's a lot of different factors into this and why this happens.
Speaker 1:But as an example, okay, let's say someone grew up with an alcoholic parent, okay, or whatever addiction it was. Well, that person may have felt the need to save quote, unquote their parent or save their siblings as an example, right. So, honestly, they become kind of the caregiver. So now it's kind of like a role reversal, right, they become the caregiver for their parent, and not only for their parent but also potentially, for their siblings as well, if they have siblings, right? So at a very young age, these people are now considered to be the caregivers not only for their siblings, but for the parent. So imagine that, right, you're in a household and you have to take care of your parents, so now you feel like you almost have to save them, right? So this is just one circumstance of many that can happen in where we kind of can develop this savior complex.
Speaker 1:And again, the important thing to understand here is that it's not up to the child to have to manage their parents' health, right, it's not up to the child to have to manage the family dynamic, right. To have to put that on a child is, you know, it's unimaginable, right, it's not something that no one should ever go through. But again, this is an example of how a savior complex can emerge and can come into our lives. Right, and that's the thing about a complex I'm not going to dive too much into this topic, but a complex the best way I could describe it is almost like you are a puppet and you've got a puppet master pulling your strings as an example, right, because a complex, when it's developed, especially in early childhood, it can influence your behaviors, your thoughts, your feelings as an example, okay. So someone who's overtaken by that savior complex will feel the need to save other people and oftentimes, the part that's very important to understand here is that this is unconscious, right, it happens unconsciously. Oftentimes we're not even aware that this is happening, and there are many other different complexes. But again, if someone develops this in early childhood, they might also bring that into their adulthood, where they feel like they need to save other people as well. So this is why I'm saying it's so important.
Speaker 1:Learning how to say no to other people is an important thing to understand right, and sometimes it's so important. Learning how to say no to other people is an important thing to understand right, and sometimes it's not just like, oh, I have trouble saying no. It's like, okay, there's a deep rooted understanding here that I need to get you know, a better understanding of of where my inability to say no comes from. Okay, very, very important, and sometimes this will need the help of a therapist or a coach. Okay, and this is something I you, something I like to help clients with as well. And if you are interested in personally what I do in my one-on-one coaching, you can definitely check in the podcast description. I have my link to my website, as well as my Instagram if you want to check me out there. But again, it's very, very important to just understand that learning how to say no can be very difficult for different people depending on the circumstances that they have gone through and been through.
Speaker 1:Now let's dive into some tips and tricks that I've personally learned and used over the years that have really helped me on how to say no. So the first step that I want to share with everyone today is the most important one is understanding that it is okay to say no. As I mentioned earlier, saying no can mean saying yes to yourself. Okay, the first step to personally, in my opinion, to overcoming these people-pleasing tendencies, or savior complex right, is to understand that saying no is okay, because a lot of us think that it's not okay for all the reasons that we talked about earlier. Okay, so it's okay to say no, especially to things that don't align with you and your core values. And it's okay to say no when you just want to spend time with yourself, by yourself or doing something that maybe you wanted to do. Right, maybe you had a night planned, someone invited you and now you're feeling, oh, I need to go right, I have to say yes. And a lot of people will say yes. I know I did that for a long time, and now I've learned that saying no means saying yes to myself and I'm bringing back more of my power, right, so it's understanding that it is okay to say no. So that's the first and foremost step that I want to share today.
Speaker 1:The second tip that I want to share with everyone today is understanding that you cannot save or please everyone. Okay, and I think this is honestly probably the most important thing that I'm going to share today. You cannot save and please everyone and, like I, like I talked about earlier, if you're someone that's been struggling with this a long time, there may be a deeper rooted belief that you need to investigate and get curious about and work through. Okay, and maybe that's with the help of a therapist or coach, like we just talked about. But, honestly, it's understanding that you're not a superhero. Okay, literally, you are not a superhero and you are not a white knight. You're not going to be able to save everyone and you're never going to be able to please everyone. Even though you do something you think is phenomenal, maybe that person still won't like it. Okay, and now you're like oh, my goodness, this is all my fault. Now they're not going to like me. All these different things, right. But again, tip number two that I just want to really share with everyone is understanding that you cannot save and please everyone.
Speaker 1:Tip number three is to find a way to say no that feels natural and authentic to you, okay. And I find that this is actually very, very important, especially when we're just really starting the journey on learning how to say no, okay. Again, when we learned to say no, there's going to be a lot of stress and anxiety coming up and all these different things, right, but it's learning a way to say no that feels natural and authentic to you, okay. So for me personally, when I started, I remember that, um, you know, obviously I had a lot of trouble saying no and just saying like no, thank you. For me, it sounded a bit too disrespectful and too rude even though honestly it's not, but it sounded like it was a bit too direct, okay. So it's just about learning how to say no to something that aligns with you.
Speaker 1:So, as an example, maybe someone's inviting you out, okay, to a certain event and maybe you're just not interested Okay, you can say something along the lines of thank you, but that isn't for me. Or thank you, but no, I'm not interested. Okay, that's very clear, that's very direct. And you didn't say anything wrong there, right, you communicated your boundaries, you just didn't want to go. And also, if someone had a problem with that as an example, okay, but just hypothetically speaking here you said that and someone was offended. Well, guess what? That's on them. It's not on you, it is not about you whatsoever. Right? You've communicated and established your boundaries. That is all that you need to do.
Speaker 1:I want to very much emphasize this again, okay, because I struggled with this for a long time. You do not need to over justify and justify every reason as to why you say no. Sometimes you can just say no. That isn't for me. You do not need to over explain everything. Now, of course, there are certain circumstances where you might need to justify, right, obviously, as an example, if someone's inviting you to their wedding and you're saying no, well, you know, maybe they'll be able to ask to justify that and that's completely understandable, right? But I hope you understand what I'm trying to say here.
Speaker 1:Okay, and this is very important to understand because, like I remember, I had a boss at work which, you know, I found phenomenal, he was amazing and he, obviously he noticed this. He picked this up from me personally, where I had these tendencies, right, and I had trouble saying no, and one thing that I kept saying was like I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, okay, I'm sorry, I couldn't do this or I'm sorry, et cetera, right, and I had to over justify myself and, like he called me one time, he's like Nick, you do not need to like, when you're saying no to something, you don't need to always justify yourself. You don't need to constantly be saying I'm sorry, right, you don't need to be doing that, you don't need to be saying that. And he really stopped me in my tracks and it was like, hmm, okay, like unconsciously, you know, I knew that I was doing that a bit, but I didn't realize to the extent until he pointed it out and called it out to me. I was like, okay, obviously this is a bigger problem for me, right? So obviously it's something I worked through in coaching and therapy, but that's what I'm saying, right, sometimes we feel the need to over-explain and over-justify and we just do not need to, okay, so it's about learning how to say no in a way that feels authentic to you. And if you're struggling with this at first, with this at first.
Speaker 1:I want to give you a quick example that I got from Psychology Today, which I found was a really cool thing. So I'm going to read you something specifically from the article, and it's called the sandwich method. I guess is what it's called, but it says the sandwich method is an approach that involves sandwiching something that individuals may consider negative between two positives. Tell the person something positive, followed by the no, and end with something supportive or positive, right, so it's literally you're sandwiching the no between two positives. Okay, so they gave an example here, saying thank you for inviting me. I really appreciate you including me in being thoughtful.
Speaker 1:However, I won't be able to make it. I would still really enjoy meeting up with you. I'll look at my schedule for some dates that I'm available so we can spend some time together, okay, so again, this is, you know, it's a good example, it's a. It's a good way to you know, especially if you're just starting out and you're having troubles with this, right, it's a good way to kind of, you know, show that. Okay, listen, thanks for inviting me. I won't be able to make it in all these different things, right, and I'm going to be completely honest here. Like, this is a very good example, but in my personal opinion, you don't even need to go that far. Okay, you could. You could just say thanks for the invite. I really appreciate you including me, but I won't be able to make it tonight.
Speaker 1:Okay, and again, very important here, you do not need to justify why it is that you don't want to go. If you don't want to go, that's completely fine. Okay, trust me, speaking from someone with a lot of experience in this, always trying to justify why I couldn't go somewhere or do something you don't need to, right? And this is what my therapist told me. It's like why, why do you? Why do you feel like you have to justify it? Right? And again, it comes down to wanting to make sure that other people accept me and I don't feel rejected, right? So that's what I mean when I say that people pleasing often comes from our own issues, right? Our own insecurities, our own low self-worth. It's really a big part of us. It's sure, sometimes we do want to help people and make sure that people are satisfied, but also there's a part of that. That's where we need to feel like we're validated and accepted and seen.
Speaker 1:So, again, tip number three is to find a way to say no that feels natural and authentic to you. Tip number four is to figure out why you're saying no. I think this can be very important, and understanding why you're saying no can actually help you in actually saying no, to be quite honest. So if someone's asking you out and you're like I really don't want to go, but I don't know how to say no, I don't want to offend them and all these different things Okay, pause for a moment.
Speaker 1:Right, just ask yourself why are you saying no right now? Okay, do I really want to do this? Right? That's the question that you can ask yourself. Do you want to do this? Do you actually the time, energy and money for this at the moment? Okay, if someone's inviting you to an event and you don't want to go, there could be a million reasons. And now you're stressing, right, like, oh, how do I say no to this? All right, take a step back. Ask yourself do I have the time, energy and money for this at the moment? Okay, if the answer is no, then that's all you need to know.
Speaker 1:But understanding why you're saying no, right, like understanding why you're saying no, can actually help you. Formulate that reply is what I'm trying to say, right? So maybe someone's inviting you to something and you know you're getting a bit of resistance to it, right, like you're getting a bit of resistance, maybe it's. You know your intuition is telling you hmm, I don't think I should go here, I don't think I should do this thing. Well, you can simply ask yourself does this align with my core values? Is this adding any value to my life? Specifically, again, the answer might be yes, the answer might be no. It really depends up to you.
Speaker 1:But oftentimes as well, a factor to consider when you are making a decision to say no is also your intuition, right, like trusting yourself, learning how to trust yourself and tap into that intuition and seeing like, hmm, do I really want to do this thing? Yes or no? Also, a final question that you can ask and there's a million different questions that you can ask but you can ask yourself am I saying yes only because I'm scared of saying no? That's another big one as well, if you tune into that and you're like hmm, yeah, I don't know. I don't know what to say here. I don't really know what to do. Okay, stop for a second, take a pause. Am I just saying yes to this because I'm afraid of saying no. If the answer is yes, then obviously the true answer is that you don't want to go, so you need to formulate something to say no Okay. So, again, these are just some quick tips and tricks that I've personally learned and that have helped me learn how to say no Okay.
Speaker 1:And, like I said before and I'll say it again, oftentimes, if it's something that stems from childhood, there could be a lot of different reasons for these, but it may be something that you need help with, it may be something that you need some guidance on right, but I do hope that this episode can serve as a reminder on the importance of saying no and how saying no can mean saying yes to yourself. So, that being said, that's all I've got for you guys on today's episode. If you did like the episode, please feel free to leave a comment or review, share it. It really helps bring awareness to what I'm trying to do, which is really kind of, you know, spread this podcast on a broader scale to really help people just navigate everyday life challenges. So, again, with that being said, I hope you have a good week and I will catch you guys next week. Thank you.
