A Mindful Perspective
Welcome to my podcast! I'm Nick Levesque, and I'm on a mission to help you navigate life's challenges with a mindful perspective. Join me every week as I dive deep into the realms of mindset, spirituality, and personal growth. Drawing from my own experiences, I want to provide you with tools, strategies, insights, and inspiring stories that will help you go from where you are now, to where you want to be.
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A Mindful Perspective
The Dark Side of Self-Improvement
Have you ever felt trapped in the relentless pursuit of personal growth, only to find yourself spiraling into self-criticism and caught in the grips of hustle culture? In this week's episode, we dive deeper into the layers of this billion-dollar industry to reveal the paradox at its heart. There can be a dark side to self-improvement. Through personal stories and hard-earned lessons, this episode strips away the glossy veneer, guiding you through the tension between the transformative allure of self-help and the grounding power of self-acceptance.
We dissect some of the common pitfalls of self-improvement, from using self-care as an escape to the deceptive promises of quick fixes. This conversation is an invitation to a more balanced approach to self-improvement, one where mental well-being and acceptance are not just buzzwords but essential components. Let's embrace the empowering realization that we are already complete and capable of growth while remaining true to our essence—as we are both a masterpiece and a work in progress.
Hello everyone and welcome to A Mindful Perspective. I'm your host, nick Levesque, certified Spiritual Life Coach, and I'm here to share insights into my journey of mindfulness and self-discovery. Each week, we'll explore mindset, spirituality and personal growth to help you navigate life's challenges, with practical strategies and inspiring stories. Let's dive in. Hey everyone, and welcome to another episode of Mindful Perspective. So in today's episode, I want to do something a little different and I want to have a heart-to-heart with everyone and I want us to talk about the dark side of self-improvement. Okay, because I think it's something that's not talked about enough and I think it's something that I really want to dive into today, because I think it's something that's very important to shed more light on and bring more awareness to. So today I really want to dive into this. Okay, so, the dark side of self-improvement. So, first and foremost, I just want to start by saying self-improvement is amazing, right, like it's a great thing, it's a great tool, it's personally helped me in such a profound way in my own life right and through my own struggles, as you know. I've talked about my story before and I'll talk about my own story about the dark side of self-help in this episode. But you know, as you know, obviously, I'm an advocate for improvement, but the thing is, sometimes, I think, what is not discussed enough is that this can also come at a cost, because I'm a firm believer that too much of anything can also be a bad thing, and in this day and age, I think that self-help is a very hot topic. There are so many self-help books and books on improvement that we can read, so many podcasts, that we can listen to personality tests and quizzes, that we can take YouTube videos, that we can watch courses that we can take to really help us dive into specific parts of ourselves. All these different things, right. And the thing, though, self-help is still an industry, right. I think that's something that we need to really take into consideration. Okay, and with any industry, I would say that there's also potential for risk in that as well. Okay, and I was looking at a stat and basically, first and foremost, I want to say that self-help is literally a billion dollar industry. Okay, so let that sink in for a second right A billion dollar industry, okay. Secondly, I was reading a study that was saying, or a stat, sorry, basically that was saying that by 2032, okay, the self-help industry was projected to be at $81 billion. Okay, so I'm going to say this again here $81 billion by 2032. So just let that sink in for a moment Now.
Speaker 1:I just want to be very clear about something I know that many people are in this industry to really help people and have genuine, good-hearted intentions, right? Coaches, therapists, content creators, all these different things, right? People on YouTube, so many like. There's so many different walks of self-improvement, if you will, right, and I know that so many people have so many good intentions. But, again, this is an industry, right, and I know that so many people have so many good intentions, but, again, this is an industry, right, and I think sometimes we need to watch out for these fake gurus that promise us so many things. Right, we need to watch out for these fake gurus that, you know, just want our money as an example, right, because the thing with self-help is there's always something to quote, unquote, improve. Okay, and I'm going to get into that a bit later.
Speaker 1:But the problem, I think, again, with self-help is that it can lead us to constantly pursue growth, right, we constantly want to be a better version of ourselves. We want to constantly improve something or quote, unquote, fix something. Right, and you know, first and foremost, there's nothing that's a broken about us, but, honestly, I think just sometimes it can lead us to an endless pursuit, right, and I think, especially in this day and age, I think just sometimes it can lead us to an endless pursuit, right, and I think, especially in this day and age, I think we can all somewhat agree that, you know, there's a hustle culture, right, we got to hustle, we got to, you know, work towards our goals, want to achieve the next thing, get higher, and then we, you know, compare ourselves to other people on social media, all these different things which makes us hustle even harder, and there are so many different aspects to this. Now I want to take a bit of time to share my own story on the dark side of self-help. Okay, so, as you know, I've shared my story many times on the podcast and if you're new here, you can listen to my first episode where I really dive deeper into my story. But when I was around 21 to 22 years old, I went through my own dark night of the soul, which is essentially rock bottom. So, basically, long story short. With that being said, I really started to work on myself and, as I mentioned, the story before.
Speaker 1:For me, reading changed my life in a really good way. I started to work on myself and it helped me tremendously. But what I noticed was that the benefits of the self-improvement when I first started took a while to come in, because what I noticed was I was stuck in this consumption. I was stuck consuming information and I actually was not applying anything that I learned, right? So I became very self-aware.
Speaker 1:But I also became very self-critical and self-conscious, right? Because I was learning all these different things and I was like, oh, okay, this is amazing, I discovered this about myself. And then, you know, onto the next thing. And then I was trying to listen to something else read another book, buy another course, and all these different things, right, and this is really what I want to tell you. Okay, there will always be something else. There will always be another book, there will always be another podcast, there will always be another YouTube video, there will always be another course, okay, and literally I spent thousands of dollars on courses books you name it right, and all this to try to help myself. Okay, and literally I spent thousands of dollars on courses books you name it right, and all this to try to help myself, right, all this to try to really self-improve, and I'm very happy with what I learned.
Speaker 1:But here's the kind of paradoxical moment that I discovered for this right, or discovered through this, I should say I was doing all of this because, at the core, one of my really big beliefs was that I was never good enough. I never felt good enough. But how paradoxical is it that you spend so much time and money working on yourself and you still don't feel good enough? Because now, this is the part about self-improvement that I think can be a bit dark.
Speaker 1:What I've noticed for myself personally, clients that I've worked with and just people that I've talked to along the way is that oftentimes, this road of self-improvement because we're striving to be better quote-unquote right, we're striving to be the better version of ourselves and heal all our traumas and, you know, work on the things that we need to work on, all these different things it leads us into this endless pursuit of knowledge, right, it leads us into this endless pursuit of knowledge, right, it leads us into this endless consumption. We go down a rabbit hole of consuming, consuming, consuming. We read the books, we listen to the podcast, we watch the YouTube videos, we buy the courses, we do all these things and then we feel stuck. We do all these different things and then we still feel stuck. Okay, first and foremost, because a lot of times as we end up just consuming and we don't actually apply, okay, so knowledge, okay, it's not power, applied knowledge is power. So that's the first thing.
Speaker 1:But secondly, what I've noticed for me personally is, as I was consuming more and reading all these different books also, what it did it was it was highlighting other things that I quote unquote needed to work on, right. So it was highlighting other things that you know I didn't right. So it was highlighting other things that you know I didn't have. Or it was highlighting insecurities that I had that I thought that I needed to work on. And after a certain point in time, I was like, wow, I'm doing all this work and I'm actually feeling, you know, still not good enough. In fact, I felt even more not good enough, if that makes sense, right? Because then I'm listening to these podcasts saying you should be doing this, you should be doing that, you know you should be working on this. You know, rest is for the week, or all these different things, right? So I became very self aware, but I became also very self conscious.
Speaker 1:There's a big difference between being self aware and self conscious, right? Self awareness is something we use for ourselves, not against ourselves. Self consciousconscious is when you become so self-aware, but you become very self-critical about yourself, right, and that's not where we want to go with this, right. Self-improvement is to help us. It's to improve ourselves, to lead a better life. If I could sum up self-improvement in one sentence is we want to better ourselves for ourselves, because we want to feel better. We want to show up in the world as we're meant to, and we want to make sure that we work on ourselves, not to unconsciously bleed on other people. Right, I think that's the very important part.
Speaker 1:But sometimes endless consumption can make us feel like, oh my goodness, we've got to work on all these different things, right, because the podcast says you should do this, that thing says you should do that, that thing says you should do that. Right, and I'm not sure if you've noticed this, but there will always be another book to help you with that other quote unquote issue that you have. Right, there will always be another podcast to help you with that other quote unquote issue that you have. So then you get confused, you get kind of just overwhelmed, right, like for me, I got so overwhelmed and, in fact, it made me, uh, like, first and foremost, very self-conscious, but it made me feel like I was not good enough, even more, because I was like, wow, all these people seem to have it together and I don't, right, like I'm reading all these things and it's making me feel more horrible. Right, we get into this kind of comparison trap as well. And also, another thing that happened for me specifically as well was, not only was I self-critical, not only was I feeling not good enough, okay, but there's a few other things that happened was, first and foremost, I started shooting myself all the time, okay, when I wasn't doing anything, because of this hustle culture, because I was comparing myself to so many people, right, because they're all doing the work. So I should be doing more work, right, I should be reading, I should be studying, I should be doing more work, right, I should be reading, I should be studying, I should be learning, I should be doing this, I shouldn't be doing that as an example, right? So this trap of self improvement what happened for me specifically is it was no longer about improving myself, right, like, yes, it was, but it was to a point where it was detrimental to my mental health. Right, it was like, okay, if I'm not reading, well, you know I'm a failure or I'm not good enough, right, or I should be doing that. And, like I've talked about many times before, shooting ourselves oftentimes is linked with shame and guilt, right, and this is what happened to me. Okay, and we're supposed to be doing this to help ourselves, but then when we're not doing something, we feel guilt, we feel shame as an example, right, so we end up shooting ourselves all the time. And just take a moment to consider that for yourself. Right, let's say, you're not doing something as an example, right, do you shoot yourself? Do you think like you should be doing, that? You should be doing this? And again, sometimes, like I always say as well, sometimes we should shoot ourselves. Quote, unquote right, as an example, if you, you know you should be studying for your exam tomorrow, then you probably should study. Okay, if you haven't been to the gym in two weeks and you've been telling yourself that you want to go to the gym, then maybe you should go to the gym, right, that's a different circumstance, but sometimes this list of shoulds goes on and on. Right, we should be doing that, we should be doing this, we shouldn't be feeling that way, we should be, etc. Okay, so this is what I noticed.
Speaker 1:For me was like the whole point of self improvement was to improve myself, but when I wasn't doing something, I was detrimental on myself, and that is not how self improvement should go at all. Right, we should be feeling great about the improvements that we make. We should be feeling good about how far we've come, and that's the other thing as well. Right, not only was I, you know, very self-critical, but I no longer remembered how far I came. I was so worried about this other version of me that I needed to become. I was so worried about these goals that I needed to achieve, how many books I needed to read, how I needed to fix myself as an example, right. And I wasn't celebrating the small wins anymore, which is so, so, so important, right, I even forgot how far I came.
Speaker 1:And the thing about self-improvement is it's a journey. It's a lifelong journey. It's supposed to be fun. You're supposed to go at it with a sense of wonder, of compassion, of kindness towards yourself, right? Because, again, sometimes, when you're in the self-improvement part as well. You will meet parts of yourselves that are harder right, the shadow parts of yourselves that are, you know, are harder, right, the shadow parts of yourselves, all these different things. But it's really important to go out with a sense of compassion and really see it as an adventure, right, almost like a quest in a video game, if you will. Right?
Speaker 1:And the second thing for me is that self-care became an avoidance strategy, and for a lot of people, that's what it is as well. Okay, so, like I said, I was reading all these things. I thought I had all the knowledge that actually wasn't even applying, but what I noticed for me specifically was like books and courses and all these different things became an avoidance strategy for me. So, whenever I felt overwhelmed, whether whenever I felt stressed or whatever, right, I was like, okay, well, instead of just focusing and fostering that emotional resilience right, and that growth and really learning or applying what I learned, I would just escape myself. Right, I was like, okay, you know, I'm not feeling good right now. Okay, let's read more, let's listen to that podcast on how to do this, let's watch this YouTube video, right? So I was actually just numbing myself with knowledge, right, I was actually numbing myself with consumption, I was losing myself in books for absolutely no reason, and it's only a little while into my journey that I noticed like, wow, okay, like, not only am I not applying anything here, but I'm avoiding everything and I'm using self-help as an avoidance mechanism, as a coping mechanism. Right, I'm using self-improvement here as a way to not deal with my stuff, not confront these challenging emotions or these challenging thoughts.
Speaker 1:Right, I thought reading the next book or listening to the next podcast would help me. Right, would solve all of my issues. And, of course, it didn't solve any of my issues. Right, because it's like my therapist had told me humans are like onions. Right, there's layers after layer. We uncover a layer. There could be a deeper layer, and that's not necessarily a bad thing.
Speaker 1:It's like I said earlier we want to improve ourselves. We want to know what is holding us back so that we can move ahead. Move forward. We want to make sure that we can address our traumas and work through our traumas so that we don't end up bleeding on other people and that we can live a more fulfilling life. Right, it's like I said earlier self-improvement should be about living the life that you want to live. It's about living in a more peaceful, calm body, so your nervous system is not always in a fight or flight state or freeze or all these different things. Right, it's so that you don't end up people pleasing your whole life and don't do anything for yourself. But again, more consumption does not always mean more results. Right, if you find more insecurities about yourself, if you listen to something that says you should be doing that or should be doing this, or you know you should be working on that, and if you're not working on that, then what are you doing? Right, you're wasting your time as an example. Right, then that can just lead you into a cycle of shame. It's not how self-improvement is supposed to work.
Speaker 1:Okay, and a lot of people as well will also, you know, keep themselves busy, right, oh, I'm busy. I'm always doing something. I'm busy, busy, busy. Okay, it's like I was doing. Right, I was busy because I was avoiding. Right, I was using busyness, if you will, as a coping mechanism. I was keeping myself busy not to deal with stuff. I thought I was being productive when I was reading all the books and doing all these courses. Right, but I wasn't being productive at all. I was just keeping myself busy. Okay, keeping myself busy not to feel, keeping myself busy to think I was actually doing something productive, and there's such a big difference between being productive and being busy. And maybe, you know, perhaps I'll make an entire episode dedicated to that specifically.
Speaker 1:And I just want to clarify something very quickly as well. Okay, I'm a big advocate of reading. I something very quickly as well. I'm a big advocate of reading. I'm a big advocate of books, podcasts, all these things. They are very helpful and very beneficial tools on our journey. That's very important.
Speaker 1:But one thing I noticed for me as well as it was consuming more books, youtube, knowledge, et cetera. I noticed that I started looking more outwards for answers to other people, for solutions to these videos, podcasts, books, courses, et cetera. Actually, I started more ignoring my own body's wisdom. Our body is so, so, wise, our body has so many of the answers. I actually stopped looking inward because I thought outward had all the answers. Also, I stopped really thinking for myself because I was always reading someone else's thoughts, reading or listening to someone else's thoughts or advice on something and again, there's absolutely nothing wrong with asking people for advice or consulting different resources to gather different perspectives as well, right, but again, I'm a firm believer that if we can simply sit down with ourselves and ask ourselves a few questions, I mean, if we really think about it we talk to ourselves a lot during the day, so this is really no different. So sometimes, instead of reaching for the book or the podcast or whatever, sit down with yourself and just see what your body has to say about the question that you have. But I also just want to highlight a few things to look out for as you're going into this self-improvement and just kind of quickly do an audit and make sure that you're not falling onto this dark side.
Speaker 1:Okay, but, like, an example of this could be toxic productivity Okay. So the compulsion to always be productive Okay, this can often lead to burnout or overwhelm. It's what I was saying earlier. Right, we always want to pursue. We see other people doing stuff we need to be pursuing, and this can literally lead us to, like, feel physically and mentally exhausted. Right, it can reduce our creativity. We don't feel inspired to do anything and it can just really not work, improve our life in any way. Right, that's really what I'm trying to get to.
Speaker 1:An example of that could be hustle culture, right. The glorification of constantly being busy is what I was talking about earlier, right. And the guilt associated with taking breaks like that, for me, was such a big issue for so long, something that I worked on for so long in therapy is like I could just not do nothing, right. Like I could just not sit with myself and be with myself. And if you look at the word human being, it's separated for a reason. In my personal opinion. It was right We've got the human part, but we've also got the being part. It's to just allow ourselves to be. Okay. There's a big difference between doing versus being, and I think we need to balance those out. I don't believe in hustle culture. Personally. I believe that a lot of people think it works for them and then they end up burnt out, they end up overwhelmed, even though they don't share it with people, right? So again, if you you, if you're finding yourself being toxically productive or have guilt associated with taking breaks and such, I think you know that's a sure sign that you need to really maybe take a step back and reassess that.
Speaker 1:Another one, something that I think can resonate with a lot of people is perfectionism, right, an unrealistic desire to achieve flawlessness if you will, right, and that can lead to a lot of dissatisfaction, stress, anxiety and even depression for some people. An example would be like fear of failure, right, so you don't want to fear like. You fear failing, so you don't do anything. Right, you procrastinate because you're afraid that your post is not going to be perfect enough or you're afraid that, whatever it is, your YouTube video, your podcast episode, won't be good enough. You've got all these fears, right. It's not perfect enough, so it actually. You procrastinate on it, right? And then the more you do that you can lead your body into going into a shutdown state. So your body goes into a freeze state. Your nervous system response goes into a freeze state, right?
Speaker 1:A lot of people think procrastinating is laziness and it's not. It's your nervous system's response telling you hey, I'm shutting down because I'm constantly worried about something. I'm constantly in my head, and the more you think about all these fears of failures and such, you put yourself in a position where you won't act. So you want to stay safe, you want to stay comfortable, to avoid that failure, to avoid that potential rejection or whatever, right, but I just really want to drive this home. But there's no such thing as being perfect, right, no one's perfect. No one is perfect at all. No one's got it all figured out. You know, the best way is just to try. I know it's hard to sometimes put ourselves out of our comfort zone, but I think that's a really good way to do it right is to really go against what our mind is saying and really act on it, okay.
Speaker 1:Another one is, again like we were talking about earlier, right, shaming and guilt. Right, we're not doing enough, we're falling behind. If we're not meeting certain goals or specific standards, then we're not good enough, right, we've got all these feelings of shame and guilt associated with us. We've got these unrealistic expectations as well, right, like self-improvement industry can sometimes promote unrealistic expectations, right. So sometimes this is another part as well, right? What I was talking about earlier with the gurus and such. It can be kind of like promising quick fixes or overnight successes, and this can lead people to feel very disappointed or even frustrated or even demotivated because they're not seeing results.
Speaker 1:Right, sometimes you'll see something like heal your trauma within a week or like heal your trauma in seven days as an example. Right, like, personally, for me, I don't believe in that. I don't believe that you can heal anything that fast, and I think that, especially something as complex as trauma, depending on what you're going through, depending on your trauma, you know, and this is what I mean by sometimes the self-help improvement has that dark side as well, and it's an industry. People will try to sell you these quick fixes, and there's no quick fix, there's no quick fix, and it can also lead to financial exploitation. It's again like I said, the self-improvement industry is a multi-billion dollar industry, okay, and some of the products can be very costly as well. Right, some of the products and, like I said earlier, I just wanna be very clear on this there are some great products out there, great coaches, great therapists that you should invest in and that can very much help you, right?
Speaker 1:But if you're like me and you were in this endless consumption of knowledge, I was buying book after book, course after course, and I just felt pressured to learn more, and then it just made me spend money that you know I would not have needed to spend. Is what I'm trying to say, right? And just another one that comes to mind that I want to share as well is comparison and envy. Ok, I think this is a big one, constantly comparing ourselves to others, constantly comparing ourselves to what we see on social media right, that can lead to significant feelings of inadequacy. It can also lead us to have low self-esteem, being jealous or envious of people and kind of have like a diminished sense of self-worth, right, because again, it makes us feel not good enough. Right, we're doing all this work, we're not getting the results that we thought we were promised by this guru or by this seven day, you know, weekend course or whatever. It may be right, but, like social media comparisons, keeping up with unrealistic standards, there are so many different avenues here. But again, comparison and envy is a big one that you know I've personally been through myself but that other people go through as well. Okay, so these are just a few signs as well that I want to share, to kind of be cautious of Now, for a lot of us, myself included, okay, I think that a lot of us have this unconscious belief that something is wrong with us.
Speaker 1:Okay, and we've got this strong impulse to fix it and prove ourselves that we are worthy, that we are enough, that we are good enough. Okay, and I just I really want to say something, and I hope this sticks with everyone, and this is something that really took me a long time to understand, but I really hope that this can resonate with people. Okay, there is no fix necessary. Okay, you are not broken. You are not a project that needs to be worked on. You are not something that needs to be glued back together. Okay, you are not something that needs to be fixed back together. Okay, you are not something that needs to be fixed, and I want to share this powerful quote with everyone.
Speaker 1:I think this is probably one of the most powerful quotes that I've ever read, and you know I've read a lot and I've shared a lot on the podcast, but essentially, it goes as such and, just like the moon, you are still whole, no matter what phase you are in. Now, if you need to go back and listen to that, please do, because I think it's probably the most important thing about this episode and it's really what I want you to take away from this episode. Okay, you were never broken. You were never a project that needs to be fixed. You don't need to be fixed. Okay, just because you've got traumas, just because you've got things that you want to work on, okay, it's not because you're broken, it's not because something's wrong with you.
Speaker 1:And I think this is a big part of the whole mental health stigma as well, right, why a lot of people don't want coaches or don't want therapy or you know, because sometimes it's that feeling I know for me personally anyways, I'll speak on my own behalf here but, like when I first started with this, I was almost thinking to myself like, okay, like if I'm reaching out for help, if I'm asking someone for help, like does that mean something's wrong with me? And absolutely not right. Like asking for help is a sign of strength. It is not a sign of weakness, okay. So I just really want to make that clear. You are worthy right now. You are enough. Right now, you are a whole. As you are.
Speaker 1:Okay, you can simultaneously be a masterpiece and a work in progress, and I also think it's so important that we don't get so focused on who you want to become that you forget who you are right now. Okay, I think that's a very big part, and I know you know in this self-development journey we talk about self-love and self-care and such, but I think a very important component is also self-acceptance. Right, it's to be able to accept ourselves in the moment as we are. There's nothing wrong with wanting to work on our traumas and work on our you know, work on certain things, work on our goals, all these different things, right. But even though you're not that version of you quote, unquote that you want to be right now, it doesn't make you any less, it doesn't make you any less worthy and it doesn't make you less good enough, right? It's like I keep saying you are whole as you are and I think for me, this was the big shift, right, because, like I said earlier, I'm not good enough, was a big thing for me for a long time, right.
Speaker 1:And again, this goes back to a lot of different things childhood, all these different things, and I kept reading like self-love, self-care, do these great activities and such, right, but I think to get to self-love, you need to have acceptance. How can you love yourself if you don't accept yourself? Right? That's what I'm trying to get at here. How can you love yourself truly and honestly if you don't accept yourself for who you are, if you don't accept the parts of you, right, even the shadow parts of you that you don't really want to bring to light as an example, right? I think self-acceptance is about really accepting ourselves as we are and then, obviously, working to become the version and the person that we want to be and that we're meant to be. But again, I just want to say this again don't get so focused on who you want to become that you forget who you are right now, because the person that you are right now is more than enough.
Speaker 1:And this is why I say in so many of my episodes to approach self-improvement with curiosity, with compassion, with kindness and, most importantly, that sense of wonder. Okay, it's about getting to know ourself right. Like we enjoy getting to know our partner when we first meet them, our friends when we first establish that ourselves. Right, like we enjoy getting to know our partner when we first meet them, our friends when we first established that relationship. Right, we should have that same curiosity and that same approach with ourselves. Right, what we give to other people should be reciprocated onto ourselves. And a lot of times I've said this before, but a lot of times we spend so much time learning about other people, learning about you know so many different things, and we don't put that time learning about ourselves right. And as we learn about ourselves, sure, there are things that we're not going to like. There are things that are going to be scary to look into, but this is why I keep saying curiosity, compassion, kindness and a sense of wonder, because if we can start looking at it that way, we're not going to be so hard on ourselves. Because if we could start looking at it that way, we're not going to be so hard on ourselves. We can truly become self-aware rather than self-conscious, which I think is so important.
Speaker 1:Okay, and another very important thing that I want to mention here is you have nowhere to get to. Okay, there's no destination that we need to reach, there's no level of enlightenment that you need to get to. Right, a lot of people, I think sometimes they feel like you know okay, once I get there, I'll be happy, I'll be fulfilled, I'll do all these things right. And then you get there, and then you want the next thing, you want the. You know. Oh, no, now I'm, I'm here, now I have something else that I need to work on, something else that I need to improve. Right, there's nowhere to get to, there's absolutely no destination. Okay, the way I see it is, it's a journey, it's an adventure. Right, it's a journey to get to know yourself. If you're trying to reach this peak of enlightenment, I'm sorry to say, in my personal opinion, I don't think you'll ever get there, right, and in my personal opinion, why would you even want to get there?
Speaker 1:I think the beauty of being a human is to experience life as it is right, that means there will be ups and downs, but we grow from our good experiences and we grow from our bad experiences. And there's this great quote by Alan Watts, and if you don't know who Alan Watts is, he's a phenomenal philosopher and, honestly, he's one of my idols. Personally, I just admire how he sees the world and he studied many different traditions and religions and he said something that always stuck with me and he said man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun. And I think that is such a profound statement because, again, you know this, this whole experience that we have as human beings, right, as sometimes I feel like you know it should be taken seriously and all these different things. But also it's, it's something, it's an adventure, right, it's like a kind of a video game, right, we level up, we level up our character, we try different things, we experience new things, but I think sometimes we can take life too seriously, right? I think sometimes we can take our growth too seriously. It should be fun, right? It should be something that's fun.
Speaker 1:Self-improvement should never be something that's making you feel shameful, making you feel guilty, because, again, that's completely paradoxical, right? You're trying to improve yourself, yet you're feeling worse, like I did for a long time, right? So, again, this is really what I wanted to talk about in this episode, and I know it's a bit different than what I do in my typical episodes, but I really wanted to have this heart to heart with everyone, because I think this is a topic that is not talked about enough. Okay, it's great to have goals. It's great to have goals. It's great to have ambitions. I'm all for it. I've got my own goals and my own ambitions.
Speaker 1:But where is the balance? Right? To what cost? Okay, if you need to rest, you can rest. Rest is in a reward that you receive for your endeavors, as an example, right? That's what I mean, and you know you are enough as you are right now. You are whole as you are.
Speaker 1:Okay, you're always whole to begin with, right, wholeness is your birthright. It literally is the moment you hit this planet, you're a whole. You don't need anything more. You are whole as you are, and this is really what I'm trying to say from this episode. Right, we need to stop looking at ourselves like we're broken or we're a project that needs to be fixed or worked on, or we need to be put back together. So, that being said, that's all I've got for you guys on today's episode. If you did like the episode, please feel free to leave a comment or review, share it. It really helps bring awareness to what I'm trying to do, which is really kind of, you know, spread this podcast on a broader scale to really help people just navigate everyday life challenges. So, again, with that being said, I hope you have a good week and I will catch you guys next week. Thank you.
